So I have no clue what exactly what is going on between me and Lexie, all I know is that I am putting so much into our relationship and I am not getting anything out of it.  She thinks I am obsessed with sex, but I am not! Regular couples have sex multiple times a week. Lexie and I see each other maybe 2 times a months and it is fair for me to want physical contact on those days… Something is seriously wrong because she does not return my love,  all she does is say “i love you” but anyone can say “I love you”  it does not mean anything if you don’t back it up. She does not show me she really loves me, she does not show me that I am something special to her, she makes everything about herself. Every time I try to tell her “hey, I don’t feel the love and that makes me feel so bad I want to actually kill myself” she interjects with telling me her whole life is screwed up and because of that she does not want to show me she loves me. Now I can understand her being depressed and sad, but the point is we all feel that way all the time. Especially me but I still go to the ends of earth for her. Making her feel better is what I have been doing for the past few months. Maybe if she showed some love and interest in me I would not have to validate our relationship with sex. That said I still want to have sex with Lexie, in fact I want sex on a regular basis, sex is suppose to be something beautiful… The kind of sex we are having now… I might as well be having sex with a blow up doll. This really aggravates me, she is so goddamn inert. She says I love you and then forgets about me so easily which makes me see she does not care. This fucking sucks.

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